I’m a question mark
Walking talking question mark
But what is the question again…
Life may sometimes be sad
But it’s always beautiful…
- “Whats the Use”, Jamie Lidell

I watched a shadow of the Milky Way
twist beyond the flames of a bonfire
let my feet drag in cold green water
and the sun soak into skin
I heard words, took them in
rewrote the song of my soul
just a little bit.

I fell in love again
all things go, all things go
I drove to Chicago
all things know, all things know…
- “Chicago”, Sufjan Stevens

My birthday is in 5 days, and I feel like maybe I am just starting to appreciate the age that I am.

Don’t underestimate the power of a bike ride at the end of August around the city of Chicago. Or a weekend trip to the middle of nowhere.

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I studied on the back porch with the setting sun warming my feet and a soda near at hand.

The sounds of the city, construction, cars, and chaos do not detract from the utter peace and enjoyment of such an activity.

If you’d ever like to study with me, you know where to find me. At least until it gets too cold outside, in which case I’ll be at the coffee shop down the street.

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Tomorrow is the first day of school. I am ambivalent.

I have most of my books, all of my supplies, and my schedule is set. I just have to show up to class!

The next few weeks will be flying by non-stop. Roommates/friends moving in and out of the house/neighborhood will keep me occupied, I am sure.

If your neighborhood ever has a block party, I recommend that you attend. You may meet some interesting characters. I was introduced to an Italian woman who wants to teach me to cook Italian food (in exchange for me teaching her Persian cooking), a recent transplant from Texas with a child who wanted to know where to eat in the neighborhood (I was happy to oblige), an older couple with a friendly dog who lamented the fact that their son was not in attendance, and a woman with a young daughter from Ghana. There were at least 4 interracial couples and probably 30 children running around.

And I can’t even describe the food.

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A recipe! Feel free to adjust as you wish. I made it up while contemplating the contents of my refrigerator, realizing that I was limited in my choices.

Ingredients:
1 clove fresh garlic
4 chopped green onions
1 small bunch of fresh cilantro
1 large tomato
salt
pepper
dash of tumeric
olive oil
1 teaspoon balsamic vinegar

Cook pasta until done, drain and set aside (I use brown rice spaghetti, which works very well if you’re on a gluten-free diet).

Put garlic, cilantro, and onions in a small food processor. If you don’t have a small processor, chop all ingredients very fine. Set aside. Dice tomato by hand.

Put some olive oil in a non-stick pan, warm up. Put green mixture in, fry 1 minute on medium. Put in salt, pepper, and tumeric. Add balsamic vinegar. Fry for 30 more seconds, then add tomato pieces. Fry just until tomato gets slightly cooked, then put on top of pasta!

Makes 2 servings.

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Summer is not conducive to blog-writing, at least among some of my friends. It may be that we’re too busy enjoying the nice weather. It is easier to convince oneself that there is nothing to do when there is 3 feet of snow on the ground, so sitting in front of a computer is actually productive.

Somehow the week got away from me. Reconnection with high school friends and the comfort of the suburbs (I love not having to search for parking!), sewing (I made a skirt), spending time with friends, getting ice cream and cheese fries at the local shops, biking, and reading.

I look up to realize that we have reached the halfway point of August, and things are heating up. School starting, Greenlake conference, my birthday (whee!), and a dozen other projects, events, and plans. I’m excited.

I also realize that these things all signify changes. This is my last semester of school. The weather will become hostile to bike-riding and the beach. Back-porch chats will be moved to the living room. I start the job hunt in earnest. Friends are getting married, moving, or starting new phases in their lives, a whirlwind of activity that I watch with some bemusement.

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(Click to make bigger)

I am in awe of this place, and possibilities of structure.

There are so many questions I want answers to, and yet Sunday night I made the observation that sometimes there has to be the acceptance that some questions don’t have answers (in this lifetime, anyway). I want to follow the wisdom of my heart, not get caught up in the words and phrases and thoughtless machinations…

Ah, sometimes the peace comes in mere writing for me. The flow of pen to paper (or, more likely, keyboard to screen) is like a form of meditation or something.

It is easy to allow beauty to diminish through others’ words of disparagement and disappointment. It is ok if one person likes something and another doesn’t. It would be nice if people allowed others to enjoy that beauty without comment.

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I am newly aware
of the strength contained
in my small frame.
There is something strange about knowing
exactly what to do
and that restraint
is good in its place.
Even odder is when I understand
that this was the only
thing I could do.
——————————————————
On a completely different note, congrats to any and all married/soon to be married couples (quite honestly, way too many to list here), etc etc. I’m dead tired.
——————————————————
I second-guess
and think
that this
is not going to be healed.
And it breaks my heart.
Why are things so strange here?

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Hey, my birthday is in exactly 1 month. Fascinating.

Have not made plans yet, and I’m not sure that I will.

I’m going to go enjoy the city now. How can I not, with the sun shining and my bike waiting patiently for me?

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sometimes I see
reflections behind me
out of the corner of my mind
I reach out to touch
with a fleeting glimpse
I know I’m alive
this is simple
to believe
I don’t have to try
since time
is beyond me

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One Magazine launched the Love issue today! Check it out.

I try to write, and my hands refuse to translate the thoughts from my brain onto screen. I’m fighting them, but they prefer to sit back and take a break.

On Saturday I will attempt a feat previously unknown in the annals of Sholeh-dom. I will attend two weddings on the same day.
11:30 am: Emily & Doug’s wedding in the suburbs
8:00 pm: Myk & Lacey’s wedding in the city

I love adventures like this. Wouldn’t it be great to have a camera crew along as I rush desperately from church to reception to reception? The voice-over should be done by Morgan Freeman, as is appropriate for such things.

In a search for more information about voice-overs, I came across this article: What’s the worst ad song ever? Ad agencies, be aware! Some things are just not appropriate!

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