My internship draws to a close. I don’t have any real insights about it, except that I have very little interest in retail. hah! Who would’ve thunk it?
There are usually reasons for the things I do, even if it doesn’t make sense at the time. There are certain ways I approach things, and if that isn’t the way someone else would handle it…well, I’m myself, not someone else, so it makes sense to do it my way, eh? I’m only 20 years old (almost 21), so I can’t claim that I have a large amount of experience in the world. I’m blunt, forgiving, trusting, silly, smart, and very tough when I need to be. I dislike confrontation but will take care of myself and those I love.
Most of all, I decided quite a while ago that letting people walk all over me was unacceptable. I do not put myself in situations where people feel they can take advantage of the fact that I’m a nice person. If someone makes me uncomfortable, I just can’t spend much time with them. That is simply what it comes down to.
I’m not very…personal on this blog. There are reasons for that, too. But the above is very public information about who I am, because I’m up front about that. Every aspect of “Sholeh” is non-negotiable, it is simply…who I am. And I really like that.
i like that. “non-negotiable” 🙂 i think what strikes me (and probably alot of ppl who know you better than i do) is that you have integrity, and that only comes up from someone who’s not going to compromise on their principles.
i need to learn to be more firm on what i will/not do for others – i end up being nice or putting up with ppl i don’t feel comfortable with because i can’t deal with conflict.
um. yeah i need to stop making my comments sound like self-therapy 😉
well thank you, m’dear!
i think sometimes the only way some of us (myself included) figure things out is if we talk it out or see those things reflected in someone else. 😉 works for me!
When you say ‘non-negotiable’ do you mean to the external world only? That is to say, are you non-negotiable to yourself also? I would guess that calling yourself to account implies a certain level of negotiability, but this negotiability is internal, rather than external. So I’m inferring that you’re not going to change your behavior for any reason other than concious descision. So your actions are an uncompromised reflection of your opinions/character at the moment, which may be refined later through reflection. What you think about this?
Given the above, if your external actions are at least temporarilly uncompromising, where do you draw the line between preservation of character and the feelings/opinions of others? What if someone tells you a racist joke, with sincerity? Somewhere around pg. 70 or so of Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Baha, He tells us not to offend the feelings of anyone, even if the person is an ‘evil-doer’. Of course, He had the benefit of God-given perfection, but what would the Master do in cases like that?
i realize the question is a little vauge, but i’m just looking for thoughts.
The things that make me inherently SHOLEH have stayed pretty much the same through my entire life…the characteristics that make me who I am, etc. I like what you said here: So your actions are an uncompromised reflection of your opinions/character at the moment, which may be refined later through reflection.
Good way of explaining it! However, I would have to say that my actions are more often far FROM uncompromising. My problem in the past has been that I’m too compromising and so end up with a complete lack of self-preservation. After realizing this behavior in myself, I made a goal to balance it out. The same happens in most cases with me: if my actions are not in line w/the Writings, etc, I need to re-evaluate how I am operating.
The racist joke question: I would have to say that I find such things unacceptable, but it depends on a)how well I know the person and b) what kind of reaction the situation warrants. I am not afraid to tactfully point out that we may have different opinions and that the way they phrased their comment could be offensive to me, and I would appreciate more concern for my beliefs in the future. Like you said, not being perfect, I realize that I may offend peoples hearts, but I try my best not to.
Does that answer it? 🙂