{"id":2881,"date":"2012-11-16T16:07:42","date_gmt":"2012-11-16T22:07:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/?p=2881"},"modified":"2012-11-16T16:07:42","modified_gmt":"2012-11-16T22:07:42","slug":"there-is-no-winning-this-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/archives\/2881","title":{"rendered":"there is no winning this one"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a title=\"Winter. :( by Sholeh, on Flickr\" href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/sholeh\/8183466856\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" src=\"http:\/\/farm9.staticflickr.com\/8067\/8183466856_b11d24242c_m.jpg\" alt=\"Winter. :(\" width=\"240\" height=\"240\" \/><\/a>this is the result of years of battle, the scars run deep. the tears flow free.<\/p>\n<p>if writing down a record of how you feel at this exact moment helps you remember&#8230;i am not sure that i want to.<\/p>\n<p>there is a certain responsibility in holding onto things. i am tired of fighting this war, of the wounds reopening every few months. <em>&#8220;if you don&#8217;t fight, who will?&#8221;<\/em> (i am told) but fighting a one woman battle against the forces of inertia is an exercise in ulcers and frustration.<\/p>\n<p>where do you draw the line, though? i need you (all) to fight with me, but there shouldn&#8217;t even be conflict here. i am hungry for something new to challenge me, for the excitement to come back. i love this place, but not enough to sacrifice my joy.<\/p>\n<p>it is time to move on, and it is terrifying sometimes. But I am ready.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>this is the result of years of battle, the scars run deep. the tears flow free. if writing down a record of how you feel at this exact moment helps you remember&#8230;i am not sure that i want to. there&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2881","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-thoughts"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2881","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2881"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2881\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2883,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2881\/revisions\/2883"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2881"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2881"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sholeh.calmstorm.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2881"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}